Cognitive Alchemy (Introduction & Primer)

Part 1: Deprogramming with metaphysics & magick : a how to guide: In my next post I will outline the details of what that process of reprogramming spiritually, purification & protection. How and what that starts to look like in detail, the psychology and metaphysics in a simple dot point format based upon a dot point overlap from both my own personal notes from my personal journals. Sharing it in order to provide a valuable resource that may also help others going through the integrating from MKULTRA & trauma based mind control programming process based on formula I have utilised in my own recovery. I will also outline my personal energy work for cleansing, grounding and healing your energetic sphere of influence, grounding, cantering and balancing your energetic field. This is based around the Wiccan & Ceremonial Magickal pathworking grades of elemental Air, Fire, Water & Earth. in addition to the tree of life and the kabbalah in its purest form, a system that has been inverted and programmed in many survivors. Why I see this is as important for survivors of ritual abuse and trauma based mind control is we have endured the most heinous left hand park, black lodge, black magick rituals that need to be intricately reversed. The most intense spiritual processes cannot or will not touch programming that is done with more modern technologically adept methods, especially those in the mid-late 80s-90s. Prayer and deliverance has its place but alone can often upset powerful generational spirits cemented inside the minds of survivors. By unlocking and relaying and then purging, purifying and cleansing entire system that was cemented by your programming in THE RIGHT WAY, you can achieve the most optimal deliverance, healing and exorcism (and more), that is rendered ineffective or ultimately, uninstalled by the self imposed blocks, and limits, programming has in place, alone. It’s not a path for those who want to walk an easy path. It is going to be hard either way. It will be uncomfortable on each side. This path is not a new age or generic gimmick, and has stood the test of time. It will at all times wherever possible avoid triggering themes like Hebrew words and themes that are lacking clear discernment of what they mean like other ceremonial magickal systems like The Golden Dawn, OTO, A.A. (Meaning everything is in plain English and easy to understand, unless it’s spiritism based prayers where it’s deviated into latinised roots but can be understood & translated back).

INTRO: PSYCHOTIC BITCH

 
If you read, you'll judge. SO FUCK OFF.
 
 
22/2/09
 
Incessant, consistent bordering temperamental, unpredictable A BLUR:
If I have to choose a collection of adjectives to describe the onset of this year, those would be my chosen few.
 
CHAOS.
 
Regardless of the rollercoaster worthy joy start + my chin is well above the ground and my heart is still beating heavily. 
 
I DEFY ALL SCIENCE.  
I SHOULDN'T BE ALIVE.
 
If I rewound the tick-tock clock and set it to playback the events of the past seven months, plus add a vile and disruptive little monster who cunningly asks the -7 month ago me whether she'd picture her circumstance to be drawn the way it is at current, I would of honestly told that rude and intrusive little monster that I would be a world away from here. 
 
DEAD. 
 
Regardless, I'm glad of the insipid destination which I've landed in. 
 
I spent the first 44 days of this year off my head on drugs.
 
EMPLOYED TO SELF-DESTRUCT AT ANY AND ALL COSTS. Even while I study and work. 
 
You want to know the truth though?
 
I feel like I've been reborn. 
 
Despite my "oh-so-obvious" junkie quota being fulfilled, I am more mentally stable than I've been in a very long time. 
 
Lie out my tarot cards and offer me a million dollars to reveal my future and I'll still tell you to fuck off. Fate isn't real. Nothing can be predetermined. 
 
Time is interchangeable and a flexible masterpiece. 
 
Anything is possible, this rollercoaster ride is becoming more wild by the macro-second.
 
The tunnel we're lurching through is poisoned with pitch black inevitability. 
 
I am my own god, don't try and bring me down with a kingdom of deceit.
 
This isn't real
This isn't real
This isn't REAL
This isn't REAL.
 
ASHAMED.
 
Time goes to waste

Ashamed is something that I've scrunched up and thrown away into the past.

****

accidental recovery arose from this period of intentional self annihilation.